First a bit of history.

My mother was always a bit overbearing in my healthcare, since the age of 18 I have been a very active person on such matters, but lately it's been complicated a bit. When I was 16 I showed all secondary sexual characteristics but had not started yet. She thought I may have a hormone imbalance and took me to the doctor. The doctor agreed and put me on a pill to chemically start my cycle. After that I was put on OC and was regular as clockwork. At 17.5 or so I had an irregular pap (as the doctor had also said that I had to have them annually) and then a colpo. 

DH and I have been TTC for a year and a month now. I discontinued the OC and at now have irregular menses (lastly over new years). I've recently gotten healthcare coverage and have been setting up appointments like mad. I requested to see an endocrinologist but they sent me to a family practice. She asked a ton of questions but by the end of the 45 min appointment, she was pretty insistent that I have PCOS.

Low and behold the bloodwork (the phlebotomist had to fish and I had quite a bit of bruising) and ultrasound (which are quite painful for me) came back normal. I have a slightly high LT/FSH ratio but still well within ‘normal’ ranges. At the follow up appointment she first tried to put me on metformin without any of the bloodwork to check for the insulin resistant markers. Then she decided to go check with ‘another doctor with more ob/gyn experience’ who suggested clomid. When she came back she clearly had google with clomid on her phone. She said 3 months (with no correlating bloodwork).

I went to an appointment today where they mislabeled me as pregnant and coming in for my first exam so a bit of extra sad there. That doctor basically laughed at me and threw me out (they don’t do ‘those sorts of things’). I have another appointment at a third group on April 3rd finally with an actual RE.

I have had this feeling since 16 that something just wasn’t quite right, but haven’t been able to prove anything, and one of the most frustrating bits is that I found it impossible to get any help shy of the one year mark because despite being the best versed person in the world on my body, I couldn’t have known this, right?

Compounding matters DH had a previous wife who after a long battle with infertility proved unable to carry a child. They lost the ability to communicate and drifted apart. He knows so much and I know so very little, we talk about everything though, so at least our fears are addressed and in the open, but I cannot help but draw parallels as we go through the same process.
I don’t have any friends to share this struggle with and it’s a lot of weight to dump onto DH’s shoulders alone. Hopefully I can get help here.